Depression

As the title implies, this article is going to be more serious than what I usually post.

I’ve struggled with depression most of my life. By the time I was 18 I’d gotten through almost a decade of therapy, which helped quite a bit and taught me some good coping mechanisms. Unfortunately, depression is never something that completely goes away, and the blue devils are always waiting at the edges for me to let my guard down. I’m not alone in this; a great many people suffer from similar issues of varying severity, and we all have our own ways of dealing with the internal darkness: some are healthy, some less so, and some  are tragically permanent.

This was where I was from childhood all the way through 2019 and leading up to the year that shall not be named or its sequel. Over the past couple of years I’ve taken some severe emotional blows; a number of people reading this know about some of them. So if this is what I’m dealing with now, when the lights go on with the flick of a switch and the internet is there to distract me, what am I going to do if things get really bad? Not just bad for me, but bad in general?

What I’m not going to do is give up. That’s not in my nature. Will I have the occasional pity party? Of course, I’m a human being, but I’ll find reasons to carry on. In a survival situation we can’t afford to wallow in self-pity; we have to get up and get to work to ensure we see the next day. This can be very hard with depression, even in “normal” times. To get me through the tough times, I have resources and abilities:

• I spent more than the first half of my life without the internet or cell phones, and so I can get used to living without them again if need be. 
• I was involved with a couple of living history groups over the years and they taught me valuable skills and also helped me add to my reference library. If we’re sheltering in place, I’ll still have access to my books and my tools.
• Regardless of where we are, I’ll also have my wife and our cats. They are four reasons to get up every morning no matter how much I’d rather stay in bed with my head under the blankets.

The author's three interfering little angels

Ten years ago this August we survived Hurricane Irene, even though our house was the worst hit in our town and the DEC considered ruling it uninhabitable. My wife and I lost a great number of things, and the financial hit was significant, but we carried on and we were there for each other. Which leads to my next point: one of the best resources we have to keep us going is other people, aka our tribe. Friends, biological family, or family of choice doesn’t matter; be there for each other, be kind to each other, help each other through the rougher patches and we’ll all be stronger on the other side.

If you have, or know anyone who has worked the AA program, you’ll be familiar with the phrase “One day at a time.” Dwelling on the past or overthinking about the future will interfere with living in the present. The general meaning of the phrase is that you should  focus on shorter term and smaller goals to help eventually achieve longer term and larger goals. When we can’t control most of what’s happening around us, we can focus on what we can control.

Having a routine helps. These are some of the tricks I leaned from hard won experience:

• Make lists. Keep the items on them achievable, but don’t get too granular.
• Try to start each day with a small success; it can help set the mood of the day. 
• One of the things I try to do every single morning (unless a cat interferes) is make the bed. Is it a little thing? Yes, but it gives me a minor dose of endorphins from completing a task and makes the next one that much easier. 
• Try very hard to maintain a regular sleep schedule. I struggle with this one in particular, but for those who can manage it, the benefits in attitude and general mood will be obvious.

As Harra Csurik said to Miles when he visited Silvy Vale in the Lois McMaster Bujold book Memory: “You go on. You just go on. There’s nothing more to it, and there’s no trick to make it easier. You just go on.”

GunBlog VarietyCast Radio #174 - What Caliber for Taylor Swift's Husband?

'Cause baby, now we've got bad blood
You know it used to be mad love
So take a look what you've done
’Cause baby, now we've got bad blood, hey!

 -- Taylor Swift, "Bad Blood"

• Beth and her husband are getting ready to shoot a 3-gun "buddy match". What is it? What kind of gear do you need? How do you practice for it? Listen and find out!
• Where do they find each other? It sounds like a random shooting, but the records make it sound like more is going on. Sean takes a look.
• Barron runs the websites for several pro-gun blogs, including the website for this podcast. He recently dealt with a bizarre issue where the websites were basically spamming people. He walks us through the thought processes necessary to effectively troubleshoot what turned out to be a rather complex problem.
• Miguel is on assignment.
• In this week's Main Topic, Sean and Erin analyze the CNN article "How an 'ugly,' unwanted weapon became the most popular rifle in America".
• Tiffany is on assignment.
• Holidays are naturally the most wonderful time of the year... except when they aren't. Erin has some practical tips on how to manage holiday stress and depression.
• Jordan Klepper, former Daily Show member and current host of “The Resistance” on Comedy Central made a special titled “Jordan Klepper Solves Guns” and it’s filled with anti-gun nuttery. Weer’d is here to set him straight.
• And our Plug of the Week is the NeuYear Monday First Large Wall Calendar.

Thank you for downloading, listening, and subscribing. You are subscribed, right? We are available on iTunes, Stitcher Radio, and Google Play Music!

Listen to the podcast here.
Read the show notes here.

Thanks to LuckyGunner and Remington for their sponsorship, and a special thanks to Firearms Policy Coalition for their support.

Blue Collar Prepping Transcript: 

Dealing with Holiday Stress and Depression

Hey there, preppers. It’s widely believed that suicide is more common around the holidays, but that’s a myth; the peak is actually during  late spring and early summer. However, regardless of the myth I’ve been having a rough time lately, and so probably some of you have as well. This week I’m going to give you some tips for avoiding or dealing with holiday stress and depression. 

1. Keep your expectations balanced. Or, as I like to put it when I’m feeling cynical, “Embrace the suck.”  Acknowledge that you won't get everything that you want, that things will go wrong, and that sometimes you won't feel like singing Christmas carols. Try to internalize the belief that  everything doesn't need to be perfect, so don't worry about things that are out of your control.

2. Don't try to do too much. Fatigue, over scheduling, and taking on too many tasks can make you miserable. Women especially think they have to do everything this time of year. Instead, ask for help from your family delegate as much as possible; it can be fun making Christmas preparations a family event. Learn to say “no” if you need to; by choosing to do less,  you will have more energy to enjoy the most important part of the season - friends and family.

3. Stay warm. Research has shown that warmth improves mood. If you’re sad or lonely, treat yourself to a warm bath or cup of hot cocoa, or snuggle up under a cozy blanket with a pet or loved one. 

4. Be aware of Seasonal Affectiveness Disorder. Many people suffer depression due to a lack of sunlight because of shorter days and bad weather. Using a full spectrum lamp for twenty minutes a day can lessen this type of depression. There’s a link to one that I recommend in the show notes. 

5. Understand that it's appropriate to mourn if you're separated from or have lost loved ones. If you can't be with those you love, make plans to celebrate again when you can all be together. Spend time alone to reflect and grieve, if necessary, because keeping feelings inside can lead to depression, stress, or poor health. So allow yourself to feel, but don’t isolate yourself; get out of the house and find some way to join in the festivities or otherwise do something nice for yourself, like having a quiet dinner at a favorite restaurant. 

6. Watch your diet and remember to exercise. It's normal to eat more during the holidays, but be aware of how certain foods affect your mood. Refined carobohydrates like sugar, or refined starches like white bread and crackers, can cause your energy levels, and therefore your mood, to rollercoaster up and down. Instead, eat more protein which slows the absorption of carbohydrates in your blood and increase the release of dopamine, and take a walk before or after -- or both! -- a big holiday meal.

7. Don’t play the shame game. Embarrassment about finances can lead to taking on more debt than you can afford. Instead of struggling to buy a gift, let your loved ones know how much you care and would like to, but can’t afford it. One thing I have done is told them that since I can’t get them anything, they aren’t obligated to get me anything either. It works about as well as you’d expect, but it makes me feel better because I know they chose to get me a gift anyway. 

8. Practice forgiveness, understanding, and avoidance. If some of your relatives always upset you, they are unlikely to change, so don’t set yourself up for frustration by trying and failing. Try to accept family members and friends as they are, even if they don't live up to all of your expectations. Set aside grievances until a more appropriate time for discussion. Be understanding if others get upset or distressed when something goes awry. Chances are they're feeling the effects of holiday stress and depression, too.

And if you can’t accept them for who they are, don’t let them push your buttons. You can accomplish that by not giving them the chance; get out of the house to get away and adjust your attitude. Go for a walk or drive and admire the decorations, or go see a movie. I know for a fact most movie theaters are open on Christmas Day. 

• Seasonal effects on suicide rates - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seasonal_effects_on_suicide_rates
• NatureBright SunTouch Plus Light and Ion Therapy Lamp - http://amzn.to/2ClOJ5m
• Mood Food: Can What You Eat Affect Your Happiness? - https://www.healthline.com/health/mood-food-can-what-you-eat-affect-your-happiness

Gun Blog Variety Podcast #114 - Erin Puts the Title Here Or She Gets The Hose Again

Would you listen to us? I'd listen to us. I'd listen to us so hard.

• Beth talks about teaching firearms classes for women, what she gets out of it, and why women come to her classes.
• Sean takes a closer look at the killer in a murder-suicide at Forsyth County Medical Center.
• Barron is back from his epic family vacation across the West. What tech tools did he use to make his trip easier?
• In the Main Topic, Sean and Erin discuss the intersection of depression and gun ownership, and why the "No guns for the mentally ill" argument can be used against non-crazy gun owners who just need to see a doctor now and then.
• Hurricane Tiffany is back home after a whirlwind tour of New York City and San Antonio, Texas. Strap in as she tells you of her amazing adventures being our best ambassador EVAR!
• Are you feeling SAD? Does less light in the winter months cause you Seasonal Affective Disorder? Erin talks about what you can do to fix it.
• It appears that Dan Savage likes getting smacked around by Weer'd. He's back for another Patented Weer'd Audio Fisk™.
• Our plug of the week the NSSF's website WhereToHunt.org

Thank you for downloading, listening, and subscribing. You are subscribed, right? We are available on iTunes, Stitcher Radio, and now on Google Play Music!

Listen to the podcast here.

Read the show notes here. 

Thanks also to Firearms Policy Coalition for their support.

BCP Segment Transcript:

Seasonal Affective Disorder

This past week has been pretty rough for me, Sean, and apparently for a lot of other people as well.

I don’t know if it’s the change in weather, or the poop-slinging crapfest that is this election, or something else entirely, but many of my friends have felt moody, irritable, and downright misanthropic lately.

Last weekend, I started getting one of my periodic cravings to withdraw from the world. It doesn’t happen often for me -- maybe every three to six months -- and for about 5 days I just want to be left alone and not deal with people at all. During these periods, which I see as a time of renewal like a field going fallow, I just keep to myself and catch up on my sleep and my reading. It’s basically a staycation, only inside my bedroom.

Everyone needs some alone time, and I wrote a great article about it on Blue Collar Prepping, which I encourage people to read. But just when I thought I had come out of it and was ready to face the world and deal with people again… it felt like depression crept up behind me and hit me with a knockout blow. I’m not sure what caused it, but since many of my friends are having similar issues and are blaming it on the change of seasons, I figured now would be a good time to talk about Seasonal Affective Disorder, or SAD.

Very simply, SAD is a kind of depression that happens when the seasons change. It is most common during the fall winter, although spring and summer SAD also happen. About 5% of the US population suffer from some version of it. SAD usually manifests during puberty, like so many things, and it’s more common in women than in men.

The spring and summer version, which I’m not familiar with, has these symptoms: insomnia, anxiety, irritability, decreased appetite, weight gain or loss, social withdrawal, and decreased sex drive.

The fall and winter version is something I’m acquainted with, because my mother has it. The symptoms are: difficulty waking up in the morning, nausea, tendency to oversleep; a craving for carbohydrates, which leads to overeating and weight gain; a lack of energy, difficulty concentrating on or completing tasks, withdrawal from friends, family, and social activities, and decreased sex drive.

Now some of you may be wondering what this has to two with preparedness, and the answer is twofold: One, SAD is something that can be treated and possibly even prevented with a bit of foresight, so it’s something that can be prepared against. And two, during a long-term disaster depression IS going to be an issue, whether it is seasonal or otherwise, and it’s good to know these things because it might not be possible to see a doctor during a crisis.

So here’s what you can do to prevent Seasonal Affective Disorder, and possibly other forms of depression as well.

1. Exercise. You don’t even have to get sweaty or “feel the burn”, although if you want to do that, more power to you. But just a 30 minute walk outdoors will help; both the exercise of walking and the exposure to sunlight, even winter sunlight, will help boost your serotonin levels. I talked about Serotonin back in episode 87, but the short version is that it’s the chemical in your brain that creates feelings of happiness and well-being. 
2. Get plenty of vitamin D3. This is the vitamin which your skin creates via exposure to sunlight -- which is why I suggested a 30 minute walk during the day -- but if you’re trying to prevent SAD you might as well use a belt and suspenders approach. Also, if you’re suffering from summer SAD and you really dont’ want to be out in the sun, this is a good way to get a much-needed vitamin. I currently take gel capsules of D3 that I get from the Vitamin Shoppe, and they provide me with 5,000 IU daily. 
3. Find things that make you happy and do them. This might seem like a “Well, duh” solution, but I know from experience that when I’m feeling tired and grouchy I don’t go out of my way to make myself happy. Find something that brings you joy or laughter and indulge in it. Hanging out with friends, watching a comedy, getting a massage -- all of these are recommended ways to cheer you up. 
4. Finally -- and this is more for the winter SAD than summer -- you may need find you need a Light Therapy Lamp, aka a “Happy Light”. People with winter SAD need 24 times more light during the winter months than people without the condition, and therapy lamps provide a lot of light. Daily exposure to this light should help fight seasonal depression. 

Now, I don’t think I have seasonal affective disorder. It’s supposed to manifest during puberty, and I’ve always loved the fall and cooler weather and night time I also live in Florida where it’s sunny a lot, so I’m certainly not lacking for Vitamin D3 and sunlight exposure. But I’ve gone ahead and bought a happy lamp from Amazon -- it’s got 4.5 star rating and it’s only $50, and I’m going to see if it helps get me through this election funk. If it works, great. If not, I can always give it to my mother.

Gun Blog Variety Podcast #52

Adam and Sean  make it to Episode 52! That's one full year of The GunBlog VarietyCast!

• Erin Palette gives us some very good advice about depression.
• Nicki Kenyon thinks The Donald would be The Disaster for US foreign policy.
• This week's Special Guest is Sean's father, Eugene Sorrentino. He tells us why you should never shoot all your ammo at the range.
• Barron B tells us all about why Adobe Flash sucks.
• And Weer'd goes back to that never ending well of liberal foolishness, MSNBC, and audio fisks someone we've never even heard of before.

Thanks for downloading, listening and subscribing. Please share with a friend, and Like and Share us on Facebook.

Listen to the podcast here.
Show notes may be found here.

A special thanks to our sponsor, Law of Self Defense. Use discount code "Variety" at checkout to get 10% off anything you buy.

Attitude

Picture by KJ Photography

& is used with permission.

It's rightly said that attitude is the defining factor between survival and failure. You can have all the gear, all the training, all the knowledge, all the preparedness in the world, and it won't matter one whit if you have no resolve and your response is to give in to grief, curl up and die.

I struggle with depression, fatigue, and crippling headaches on a regular basis. Thankfully I am not suicidal, but I know all too well what it's like to feel that the simple act of getting out of bed is a monumental task. And this is in the comfort of my electric-powered, climate-controlled home! I shudder to think what it would be like to do so after a disaster when I don't know what the day will bring, or where my next meal will be from, or if I'll have enough clean water.

My life is cushy, no doubt about it. I have clean clothes and a soft bed. I have fresh water and nutritious food. I have entertainment, I have convenience, and I have comfort.

And yet there are some days in this cushy life when getting to the end of the day seems insurmountable. How, then, can I expect that I will make it through a disaster?

The truth is that I don't expect it. I hope that I will, of course, and it's not like I'm counting on failure. But eventually, my chronic and cyclical depression WILL catch up to me. And while that isn't a death sentence, it will make survival that much harder -- because depression makes everything harder.

(Everyone who has had to psyche themselves up to put on shoes just to get the mail knows what I'm talking about.)

And so ultimately, I have to prep around my weakness. That means a lot of convenience and a lot of comforts in my preps. I understand some of the hard-core types believe only in the necessities, and that anything non-essential will slow them down. And for them, maybe it's true.

But as someone who gets emotionally exhausted just getting out of bed, convenience and comfort go a long way toward making existence bearable, which to my mind makes them survival items. They're emotional force multipliers.

Your mileage likely differs. That's fine. You aren't me, and I'm not you.

This post born of the fact that I'm currently in the grips of my depressive cycle and I'm tired of people telling me I'm too enamored with things. I'm not a goddamn Army Ranger or Navy SEAL. Likely, neither are you. So stop telling me I need to give up my "snivel gear." How about you give up your "more prepper than thou" attitude instead?